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Creepy schmoes ruin it for all of us fans

Oct 16, 2024 - permalink

She could have filed a police report if it was near as bad as she said.

Because she didn't take time out of her day to contact police and instead chose social media to vent, it "wasn't that bad"? That's a really fucked-up statement.

Oct 16, 2024 - edited Oct 16, 2024 - permalink

First off, I'm glad that Michaela is ok. At the end of the day, it was a very uncomfortable situation that could have become dangerous. Best case scenario is that he was an very socially awkward awestruck fan who didn't know how to properly talk to someone, but he also could have been a dangerous individual who wanted to bring harm to her (and no, her being muscular isn't necessarily a safeguard and I wish people here would stop thinking that.) Shit like this is NEVER ok, and it deserves to be called out.

Before I write my next thing I want to reference something I wrote on the "celebrity schmoe" thread about what exactly is a schmoe. I don't think being attracted to muscular women makes someone a schmoe, and I also don't think someone not being a bodybuilder themselves or a fit person makes them a schmoe. Rather, a "schmoe" is someone who is into buff women but acts creepily and inappropriate towards them. Kay Baxter coined the term to describe those creepy "fans," and that was long before the Internet era in the 80s. Creepy people have always been around, but unfortunately I think being a more digital world where people are interacting less and less in-person is fueling more of those undesirable mindsets.

Nobody is saying that creepy behaviors don't exist in other communities (as someone who is into tabletop gaming, D&D and especially Magic the Gathering I have also witnessed very inappropriate behavior,) but since this is a forum geared towards muscular women, it's not surprising that that is going to be where most of the focus is. In general, from my OWN experience being in the strength sports community and knowing muscular athletes in-person, most have no issues with people who are physically attracted to them. Rather, it's shit like what that dude did at the Olympia that sticks out, and unfortunately, EVERY athlete that I know with a least a moderate following has had creepy interactions online and/or in person (and that includes male bodybuilders and strength athletes.) As someone who loves playing MTG while having a solid social life, it sometimes pains me to see negative stereotypes about MTG players. But if I am being honest and fair, it's a stereotype that has been earned. We should direct most of our derision to the people like that dude, and not the unfortunate recipients of behavior like that who feel like they have to be cautious around those who dig muscular women.

And unfortunately, both in-person and online I have also witnessed a lot of creepy behavior. Hell, in here, we have people posting "stealth" pictures of women that they have taken without their consent who are minding their own business at the grocery store, the gym and even the classroom. And the worst part is that there are people who not only don't see anything wrong with that behavior, but get defensive when challenged. While yes, there are "admirers" who are respectful and know how to properly interact with women, there are unfortunately a lot who don't and that needs to be called out.

I found an article written in Iron Magazine on how fans should approach bodybuilders. As a disclaimer, it is a little too harsh towards people who are attracted to muscle, and I disagree with the author's view on those who he deems "not true fans," but the general premise on how to approach them at conventions and competitions is pretty spot on. How Should Fans Approach Bodybuilders?

When you run into bodybuilders IRL, or even if you message them in person, the best advice I always have is to simply treat them like you would anybody else. Don't mythicize them to an absurd degree because at the end of the day, they are human beings. Compliment them on the work they put in or maybe ask them about their training. You would be surprised how low the bar can be for leaving a positive impression. I have had women that I have talked to say that they were completely surprised when I talked to them about training, recovery, splits because they usually only get questions like: "how big are your biceps? Can your flex? Can you beat up men?"

And finally, to quote the immortal words of BIll and Ted: "Be excellent to each other!"

I completely disagree. This whole earned stereotypes viewpoint almost always falls apart under statistical analysis. Aside from that we should all understand by now why it's important to judge people on an individual basis.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

I completely disagree. This whole earned stereotypes viewpoint almost always falls apart under statistical analysis. Aside from that we should all understand by now why it's important to judge people on an individual basis.

Uhh….which one would fall apart under statistical analysis? The Schmoes? The Female Bodybuilders? Or the Magic the Gathering players?

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

> > I’m not saying this to start an argument by the way. I can see your point. She may be like that to some fans(I don’t know), but muscular women have to deal with crazy fans on the daily(not just online, but in real life too). Imagine being stalked yourself for looking the way that you look. > > Not every woman out on social media wants to be a celebrity. To some, they just want to inspire other people without having to filter out all the creeps. I imagine her being “stand-offish” is a mixture of her personality and her wariness of certain “fans”. This incident is a perfect example as to why some women are disinterested in carrying a conversation with a total stranger. > > PS: I know you weren’t condoning this behavior…..

I also want to add: When you say "fans," do you mean people who are fans of the SPORT of bodybuilding and are fans of her as an athlete and competitor, or "fans" in the sense of men who are more into her for her physique and don't really care about the sport itself? Nothing wrong with the latter, but something tells me she would be much more open if you came to her as a fan of her as an athlete than if she thinks you are fetishizing her for her look.

For Michaela, I don't think she "hates fans" in the true sense of the word, but rather has zero interest in the fetish side of the industry (hence why she doesn't shoot for herbiceps, or do cam work.) And that's ok!

Yeah I was definitely referring to the “fans” who are more concerned with her looks rather than her dedication to the sport. I’m sure she’s lovely to talk to(I don’t know since I’ve never met her). I was just trying to give as much context to the idea that she comes across as ”stand-offish”. From the interviews I’ve heard online about other female competitors, she’s an absolute gem.

So yeah, I agree with your perspective of it all.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Uhh….which one would fall apart under statistical analysis? The Schmoes? The Female Bodybuilders? Or the Magic the Gathering players?

All of them. Most generalizations are formed based on a minority of a population.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

It's just that big conventions are a highly concentrated non-representative sample of a larger population. Imagine the creeps in Las Vegas hotels for the AVN Awards or San Diego for Comic-Con or Orlando for Cheerleading Nationals. There are feet guys, chair sniffers, and pay for farts sealed in a mason jar guys creeping around. Normal women with typical features have creeps creeping on them too.

Whether it's because they're unattractive or low status or malevolent, creeps exist. It doesn't excuse the behavior, but it has always been a dangerous world. I'm not comfortable walking alone at night either. Getting shot in a botched robbery attempt is different from being followed into your hotel room, but still not ideal.

Oct 17, 2024 - edited Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

> @zig563 no woman in her right mind wants to be stalked by strangers zig, consent is a must.

I would beg to differ having met many top fbbs over the years. They don't want to be stalked, but many are fine with close up pics and enjoy putting on a show with their bodies. Some look at it as work. Prudence is needed. Fbbing has many strangers at shows. Do you think they want friends and family only? I don't. The sport is in bad enough shape as it. We saw that with the payouts as compared to Mr Olympia last weekend.

I agree on talking for sure. I think you need fans to have a sport. A basketball player in the WNBA just got "threats" in her e-mail which someone had found. Police are looking into it. She is a top 3 player in the sport. There are more mental illness and misguided people than ever before. The police were at the shows I worked to look for a stalker and this was 2003. This is not a new thing Michaela posted. She could have filed a police report if it was near as bad as she said. Tough situation, but most of the girls that have been around know the ropes and feel comfortable.

We’re talking about schmoes here not actual fans there’s a difference but the way you’ve been phrasing everything makes me believe you’ve defending them by down playing this situation the entire time. you’re arguing in bad faith.

Because she didn't take time out of her day to contact police and instead chose social media to vent, it "wasn't that bad"? That's a really fucked-up statement.

Tre_sayer said it best I’m for defending FBBs not belittling them which allows the problem to grow, you’re apart of the problem zig.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Yup. schmoes ruin it for everyone. Schmoes are the reason there is an ever growing list of GWM that want to be removed from this website.

What Michaela experienced is very scary and I am glad she is ok.

[deleted]
Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

We’re talking about schmoes here not actual fans there’s a difference but the way you’ve been phrasing everything makes me believe you’ve defending them by down playing this situation the entire time. you’re arguing in bad faith.

Tre_sayer said it best I’m for defending FBBs not belittling them which allows the problem to grow, you’re apart of the problem zig.

If he's never stalked or made a bodybuilder uncomfortable, he's not a part of the problem. Total histrionics to post this.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

If he's never stalked or made a bodybuilder uncomfortable, he's not a part of the problem. Total histrionics to post this.

Down playing the situation absolutely is apart of the problem he’s essentially defending the perpetrators by dressing their bs as a “non issue” while blaming the victim, if we want things to get better we have to call these schmoes out on their actions not cuddle them so they can feel comfortable among us and embolden to do it again like zig is doing.

And I don’t know why you’d believe that the only way for someone to be a schmoe is if they’re a stalker.. if you can’t bothered to read the other comments which have been very informative I can’t be bothered to reply to you any longer.

Oct 17, 2024 - edited Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

All of them. Most generalizations are formed based on a minority of a population.

Eh not quite…

Sure a generalization of a particular demographic won’t completely address the differences of each individual, but that’s how statistical analysis draws data. How else are you going to gather data than categorizing large groups of people into samples?

Will they all be similar one to one? No, but if there are enough characteristics to fulfill the original thesis than the analysis is considered good enough. What I’m trying to get at is there are reasons why generalizations exist because the observations are mostly(mode) true to the sample.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Yup. schmoes ruin it for everyone. Schmoes are the reason there is an ever growing list of GWM that want to be removed from this website.

What Michaela experienced is very scary and I am glad she is ok.

This website isn’t known for defending girls, the ones I’ve spoken to see it as a necessary evil in order to make ends meet.. I came back because I was hoping for change but I'll be damned If I ever locked arms in solidarity with these men none of us gain anything from defending them instead of women we only lose.

[deleted]
Oct 17, 2024 - edited Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Down playing the situation absolutely is apart of the problem he’s essentially defending the perpetrators by dressing their bs as a “non issue” while blaming the victim, if we want things to get better we have to call these schmoes out on their actions not cuddle them so they can feel comfortable among us and embolden to do it again like zig is doing.

And I don’t know why you’d believe that the only way for someone to be a schmoe is if they’re a stalker.. if you can’t bothered to read the other comments which have been very informative I can’t be bothered to reply to you any longer.

I read all the comments. That's how you form or change your opinion. You seem to love to pick on people is an opinion I've got, for example, that's stemmed from doing so. Were you the same before you quit?

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

The girls don't all hate it. There is still the session thing and ways for them to make money. You have to realize who is who and be respectful. Society is in worse shape for many more reasons than influencers acting out. The internet opened a can of worms, but it brings more positive than negative. Those type guys were always out there....just not discussed amongst fans. People feel more entitled now with all the BS political movements and lewd behavior being excepted by society. Look at what is on TV....pure trash in many cases. Kids don't have a chance. They don't go out as much unless they play a sport or do group activities. They spend their time on the net. That is something we did not have back in my day. You'd wait for the magazines and look. That was it. The sport took off with the start of the WSE and shows being on TV. It went downhill from there with PEDS and other things losing sponsorship and the insane 25% rule. The sport has never come back from that. It has improved the last 10 years a little with the internet playing a role.

What is the 25% rule?

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Anyone can get that treatment, especially those that are damn near naked on display for the world.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

I read all the comments. That's how you form or change your opinion. You seem to love to pick on people is an opinion I've got, for example, that's stemmed from doing so. Were you the same before you quit?

Who am I picking on?

This user replied to me first and I checked them for shielding these jerks who 99% of us in here agreed were problematic.

I’m not gonna bite my tongue for a guy who believes this was a “no harm no foul” “boys will be boys” moment, especially when they replied to me first then proceeded to double down on their nonsense.

[deleted]
Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Who am I picking on?

This user replied to me first and I checked them for shielding these jerks who 99% of us in here agreed were problematic.

I’m not gonna bite my tongue for a guy who believes this was a “no harm no foul” “boys will be boys” moment, especially when they replied to me first then proceeded to double down on their nonsense.

Interesting interpretation of someone else's post, as usual.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Interesting interpretation of someone else's post, as usual.

How else am I supposed to interpret their posts?

You said you’ve read all the comments here but don’t seem to notice the other user calling them out as well.

In fact You seem to be the only one who believes his replies to me should go unchecked, now how should I interpret that?

[deleted]
Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

How else am I supposed to interpret their posts?

You said you’ve read all the comments here but don’t seem to notice the other user calling them out as well.

In fact You seem to be the only one who believes his replies to me should go unchecked, now how should I interpret that?

Take it however you want.

Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Take it however you want.

Hit dogs holler.

[deleted]
Oct 17, 2024 - edited Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Hit dogs holler.

Whatever you say, Schit. You'd accuse anyone else who posted that of animal cruelty.

Oct 17, 2024 - edited Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

Whatever you say, Schit. You'd accuse anyone else who posted that of animal cruelty.

That’s a wild accusation towards some one you’ve never spoken to before, if you have to make up stories in order to win an arguments you’ve lost.

And out of respect for sabbath and the rest of the users I’m gonna cut this conversation here.

cgsweat
Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

I wonder what the guy would have to say for himself?

"Sorry, guys, I saw her and I just had to do something. I guess my brain short-circuited or something because all I could do was follow her. I might have been half-drooling as I brought up pictures of herself to show to her. She acted really weird after that and left in a hurry. I didn't think I was that creepy. Idk, I've never been with a woman before so it's hard to say."

[deleted]
Oct 17, 2024 - permalink

I wonder what the guy would have to say for himself?

"Sorry, guys, I saw her and I just had to do something. I guess my brain short-circuited or something because all I could do was follow her. I might have been half-drooling as I brought up pictures of herself to show to her. She acted really weird after that and left in a hurry. I didn't think I was that creepy. Idk, I've never been with a woman before so it's hard to say."

Yes, no sign of his Real Life Encounters post so far. Bet he took a photo when he had his phone out.

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